Has the winter blues set in?
As JOYVIAL health coaches we have a slew of tools and techniques to help us thrive and live our healthiest, most JOYful and fulfilled lives. That doesn’t mean that we eat “perfectly” all the time, never get angry or sad, or are angels in our relationships with our partners and children. However, we do have each other – health coaches supporting health coaches.
Before you read any further, please know you can now watch Hanni share her thoughts on this topic on our YouTube Channel. Or, you can just keep reading.
Prioritize Quality Relationships in Your Life
No matter who you are (health coach or not), having a person who truly cares about you, but is impartial enough to ask you all the right questions and reflect back to you what they’re witnessing, is a true gift. It creates the most fertile ground for growth.
With that said, it’s not a surprise that when the JOYVIAL Rays (that’s what our team members are referred to :) come together every month to exchange ideas, we first and foremost check in with one another. We hold space for those on the team to vulnerably share when things don’t go so well and celebrate each other when they do. The process we use is called FANGO.
How the FANGO Process Can Enhance Your Connections
Introduced by JOYVIAL certified health coach Patty, FANGO allows others to be vulnerable and share how we’re feeling in the moment. We start each team meeting with listing the letters and what each means. The letters stand for:
“F” – Feeling (How am I feeling right now?)
“A” – Affirmation (Who do I want to affirm in the group and for what?)
“N” – Need (What do I need right now?)
“G” – God (How have I witnessed God recently?)
“O” – Ownership (What do I need to own right now?)
Each person chooses one letter and shares their thoughts with the others in the group. It’s a way to allow each person to feel “seen and heard.” This simple process can be used in any relationship to enhance personal connections.
“It’s dark, it’s cold, it’s quiet”
On our last team call during the FANGO process, one of our health coaches, who lives in the northeast expressed her emotional turmoil with what I believe many can identify with. She said “it’s so dark, cold and quiet up here”. Living in the north during the coldest season, the sun rises late and drops so early that you barely get any daylight hours.
In addition, many of her friends are going through challenging times, both physically and mentally. She felt the weight of wanting to help them while needing to attend to her own mental well-being.
Each Ray then shared their thoughts and experiences on how they keep themselves optimistic and positive during these challenging times. I’ve no doubt that, as you review the below suggestions, you’ll find a few nuggets that resonate with you too.
Health Coaches Top Tools & Techniques:
Health coach Lisa first addressed her view on the struggle many of us face. We all feel, especially women, the constant push and pull between wanting to help everyone around us when we ourselves don’t feel replenished and strong. She exclaimed “It’s irresponsible for us not to take care of our well-being!” As said so many times before, we must prioritize our own health and that of our family before we can attempt to fill up other people’s empty cups.
Lisa also pointed out the difference between helping others vs. enabling others. Enabling others implies that you try to do their work for them. This could be as simple as telling others how they should proceed in their life rather than helping others come to their own conclusions and owning their decisions. As women, we often feel responsible to fix situations (the enabler), but what most people truly need is just someone who cares and listens.
When health coach Michelle feels triggered or reactive, she grabs a pen and paper, finds a quiet spot and asks herself,
“When have I felt this way before and what is this situation trying to tell me?”
Michelle explained that so often we are reacting to old wounds versus what’s actually happening right now. By simply going deeper and asking these questions we can begin to unravel the onion and what emotional wounds may be coming up that are ready to be healed. Everything happens in its own timing and sometimes we just need to sit with it, accept it and be aware of what our thoughts/feelings are – in observance and non judgement.
Often, we become angry and reactive (finger pointing and blaming) but this only keeps us stuck where we are. Once we become aware of the cycle and often (childhood) wounding that is coming up, we are no longer bound by it and reacting from that wounded place. There is great freedom in this.
It also helps each morning to just get grounded by sitting quietly for three minutes and observing your thoughts and bodily sensations. This helps to create greater mindfulness throughout your day.
Health coach Patty shared how a few statements and questions help her get grounded again. She says that when she feels anxious about something, she first reminds herself of this simple fact.
“I’m not in crisis”
She says this statement reminds her that regardless of what she’s worrying about, in the big scheme of things she’s safe. She isn’t bleeding and she’s still breathing.
Focusing on deep breathing is another tool that Patty uses when she’s feeling anxious. Deeply inhaling and slowly exhaling will trigger your nervous system to calm down again (getting you out of fight or flight). It is the simplest tool we recommend to all our clients.
When Patty’s mind feels frazzled, she also looks to become more conscious about what’s at the core of her spinning mind. She then asks herself “What is this truly about?” This simple question allows her to peel back the layers and focus on what actually needs attention vs. flapping her proverbial arms in fifteen directions.
Health Coach MJ also shared a number of powerful and proven techniques. She says,
“Sometimes we just need a good cry”.
Often, we try to force being happy when we are not by shoving our emotions down. The challenge with that approach is that deep down you haven’t dealt with the emotional baggage. So, the energy is still trapped within your cells. This not only builds up your unwanted emotions but actually creates imbalance in your cells which promotes disease.
Crying it out when you are sad or punching your mattress when you’re angry are great ways to release the emotion and move on.
MJ also says that going for walks in nature is one of best ways to help her feel at peace again. There is so much research supporting the healing effects of walking in nature (without checking your phone every few minutes).
She also shared that she can always count on a few close friends to provide a safe space; reinforcing what Lisa shared (but I think it helps to hear again…). Often we think we need to provide a fix when a friend is blue. What they usually need is someone to be fully present and to listen with an open heart, allowing their emotions to rise to the surface.
Now there you have it.
These are the go-to tools and techniques our coaches use. But like with all tools, it’s important to realize that it’s one thing to have them and another to use them. Your tools are only as good as how you use them. ☺
We are always here for you. We’re a support system for ALL our clients and want you to succeed and thrive. We help you create greater balance, peace and calm in your life.
Reach out to us today at 1-866-JOYVIAL to schedule your free consultation or click (here). Remember to like and follow us on social media Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and Twitter for all the latest health and wellness tips.