What are you training your mind to notice?
Have you ever noticed how, once something catches your attention, you suddenly seem to see it everywhere?
Our minds are constantly taking in information, but we don't notice everything around us equally. At any given moment, there is far more happening around us than we could possibly pay attention to. We have to decide, consciously or not, where to direct our focus. Over time, this can shape the way we experience the world.
You may have experienced this without even realizing it. You notice something for the first time, and suddenly you seem to see it everywhere. It may be a particular car you are considering buying, and then you somehow end up seeing it everywhere. Or you buy the latest pair of shoes that are in style, and suddenly you notice other people wearing them all the time. The same thing can happen when you become pregnant and you suddenly start noticing pregnant women everywhere. What you are becoming more aware of has not necessarily become more common. You have simply started to pay more attention to it.
The same thing can happen with the way you see the world. If you spend a lot of time focusing on what is wrong, disappointing, unfair, or frightening, you will start noticing more of it. Your mind becomes increasingly skilled at finding examples that support what you are already looking for.
This can be especially easy when you keep seeing things that reinforce that focus. Consider the news. Stories about conflict, corruption, political drama, tragedy, and problems naturally attract attention. Our brains tend to pay more attention to negative information than to positive information, in part because being alert to potential threats has historically helped us protect ourselves. News channels know that stories that capture attention are more likely to keep people watching, so negative and dramatic stories are therefore prominent in the news. If you continually expose yourself to that information, it can begin to feel as though the world is filled with little else.
The world may contain more problems than you would like, however, repeatedly focusing your attention on certain issues can disproportionately increase their perceived magnitude. When you continually focus on the negative, you will begin to see more and more evidence that the world is a negative place, while overlooking everything that tells a different story.
The good news is that this works both ways. When you start paying attention to kindness, progress, opportunities, people doing the right thing, things going well, and moments that bring you JOY, you begin to notice more of those things too. They were there all along. You simply were not looking for them.
So, my invitation to you is to start paying attention to where you are directing your mind. What are you repeatedly looking for? What are you giving the most attention to? And what might you be missing because your attention is focused somewhere else?
This does not mean ignoring the more difficult parts of life. It means giving yourself the opportunity to notice the full picture. There can be challenges and progress, thoughtlessness and kindness, uncertainty and opportunity, all at the same time.
Having said that, I personally choose not to linger on the things that could pull my attention toward the negative, especially when they are things I can’t influence or control. I give most of my attention to what is good. I notice the bird singing beautifully outside my window, the smile someone gives me as I walk past, or the good intentions of the people around me. And when I notice those moments, I pause, take them in, and do linger a little longer.
The more intentional you become about what you notice, the easier it becomes to see the things that support the way you want to experience your life. So, the next time you catch yourself focusing on everything that is going wrong, pause and ask yourself: What is good around me that I can choose to focus on?
If you are ready to become more intentional about how you experience your life, understand what influences your thoughts and behaviors, and create habits that support your wellbeing, we would love to support you. Together, we can help you gain greater awareness of what may be influencing how you see the world, make choices that align with the life you want to live, and create realistic, sustainable changes that allow you to thrive.
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